Monday, 28 April 2014

Soul-Story: 'Wind Reader', a deep diving Explorer's story

There once was a man who could read the wind. He lived in a small village on a mountain, his whole body a finely tuned instrument of sensual breath-fuelled connection to breeze.

He'd studied the colour of sky and the smell of the clouds, which sang to him deep in his nostrils. He knew the taste of the soils from the far corners of the Earth carried in pollen and dust on the airstreams, and could feel like no other, when, and from which direction, rain would come. When the soft winds would rise off the field warmed by sunlight, his skin prickled in alert anticipation before the first breath of breeze could reach him, and when the dark thunderstorm was but a thought in the cloudy mind of the heavens, his hair would tense up, pulling his awareness into presence to the pressure that had only just begun to build into airy ripples of high rising columns, gathering momentum to make love violently far overhead.

The people very much appreciated his skills and fore knowing, which seemed magical to them and helped greatly the safety of crops and children and the wellbeing of the community. In fact, often the news of the good fortune and abundance of the village would spread to other places and travellers would come to the village to seek him out, to sit with him and try to learn his secret wisdom. The man would share what he could, but never too much, as he found it impossible to teach, express or explain how he knew what he knew or did what he did. So after a while the seekers would leave, often disgruntled and speak far and wide of the wind-reading man, blackening his name and belittling his skills, and feeding the secret shame he carried close to his heart.

In his books and journals he had studied the names of the winds from all the directions, exploring their strange sounds on his tongue and sensing their character until he could feel them blowing around him, rustling pages, in his room. Tucking at his clothes and slipping into his dreams, their airy whispers would tell of strange places, would try to pull him up, into their lofty embrace, ready to take him high and far into adventure and freedom, like a beautiful woman inviting him into passion and bliss, which he longed to explore, to own and belong to, but was afraid that he couldn't. His deep held fear of inadequacy would not allow him to open to the journey offered.

Often these dreams would leave him terrified, waking in clammy sheets on soaking pillows, acutely aware of his lack of wings, his inability to fly and the danger of leaving all that was familiar and earth bound, for a leap into the unknowable alien expanse of the sky that surely was death. And though his body itched and ached as if for release on nights like these, and his racing heart pounded in his chest like a great winged horse longing to be set free, he would calm his heart rate with concentrated control and hard learned yoga breath practices, and tether his feather-twitching skin by thinking of all the responsibilities he carried which were the mark of a man. These thoughts usually weighed him down sufficiently for him to stop feeling the longing for surrender and power, and his practice succeeded, at least for the time being, to mask the great fear of his lack of wings. He felt calmer not feeling the truth of his body and safer not fully living in there.

And so it was that with time, at first the view from his window seemed less wide and bright, then the walls of his home began closing in. Little by little the space became smaller around him, increasing his acute sense of un-ease and the growing urgency to move, his great longing for sky and breeze through his hair. But he found himself almost paralysed and afraid so afraid of outside, unable to stand the shadow drift of cloud, the thought of the sky and the taste of the wind. The villagers tried to coax him outside for they missed his predictions and presence amongst them. Crops didn't do well now that the foresight of weather no longer made life on the mountain abundant. The village dwindled and one day a great dragon of lighting ripped through the village without any warning, taking with it, in it's passing, with a sweep of it's tail, the school house, and two of the people. 
'What good is a wind reader frightened of air? What use is a man who doesn't even dare to live with the fullness of his gift? What use is he to us?' grumbled the people and they left him alone with his shame and his pain. He was hungry and cold, lonely and afraid, in the little small room with the windows taped off so no breeze could squeeze in, too afraid and ashamed to explore horizons inside him or out there in the great wide spaces, he hid in the corner trying to stay unseen.

Then one night the great Night Mare of the Sky Goddess came, bursting into that room: manes a flurry of flame, and breath taking terrible her tornado like tail. Wild lust in her eyes, flanks of black ice and sheet rain, dust devil neck whipping round, foaming storm cloud lips, coming at him to tear lose the great fear stored in his heart. A furry of neighing, hail stone teeth at his throat, great gleaming hoofs like hurricanes rising high over his head, baring down like thunder, shaking him to death.
Into darkness he fell, a great terrible empty, a nothing, filled with regret and life left un-lived, a small place of no breath and poorly formed shapes, hard to see clearly: his dreams and potential left stunted and empty. 

In that moment he choose to let go, to surrender, to give up all that had held on so tightly, being smaller then small didn't work any longer, to stay shut down no longer an option. His fear might be strong but his courage was greater, cracking open the frozen parts of his body, feeling the kiss of pain (or was it pleasure?), as life forced sensation into forbidden places. The only way through was to let go completely, was to feel so fully, to be so fully, to be it all: his sex aflame and legs stretching wide, arms raised up, this leap into faith out of shame is taking all that he's got. To reach, to reach, to reach, to explore the possibility of the possible .... and to take the reins of his destiny firmly in hand. No longer a question of permission or politeness, within him the place wanting life demanding to breathe. And the pounding, the pounding, the pounding of wings, with his terror and tears, breaking free from his skin.

HA, to take to the sky, to be one with the wind, the embrace of the air and clean taste of his freedom. Wild he rises up above fear and the shackles of shame that made him belief his own story of 'not good enough' and had held him down to the thoughts that for him it was impossible to ever take flight, earth bound and heavy; well look at him now! Choosing to become what he is and always has been, he claims his freedom, the passion and realm of his choice, his wild free responsibility, his joy. 

And the blood pumps strong in the whole of his body. Wind flyer, Sky rider, this is what he is made for, is made of, this, this is his form, his truth and his power. Great Pegasus rising free as the wind, his dance magnificent, shifting and swirling, painting dawn-like the clouds that he passes, he is part of the sky and his vision is wide. He can feel what is coming way beyond the horizon, with such ease, with such grace.... 
and the words of wind wisdom and weather ways rain down inside him like the knowledge of spells.

There once was a man who could read the wind. He lived in a small village on a mountain, his whole body a finely tuned instrument of sensual breath-fuelled connection to breeze. When ever he chooses, he takes to the sky and travels far with the winds from each corner of the Earth. Having embraced the Night Mare he resisted, he's befriended his shadow. Now he takes care of his village, his realm and his body, which thrive in abundance and health. Much loved and surrounded by life lived fully, he teaches his wisdom to those who come seeking, sky readers and wind dwellers, his pupils, his people, and he is home.

Friday, 25 April 2014


Rhiannon, like many of the Lover Goddesses from all over the world, is a Mirror Goddess. For the Goddesses of Love are the Illuminators of the World. Lover Goddess is Beauty, and Beauty is Love manifested in physical form.

It is Her touch which gives us the ‘eyes of love’, when we see the good in the world or each other, or when we are first in love and see our beloved as the most beautiful, the flawless soul in a body that is beauty and desirable to us. Beauty opens and softens our heart.

Beauty makes us become more alive, draws more of our soul into our body and heart so that we can feel more connected to our physical presence, to our life’s purpose and to that which is outside of us. With the opening of our heart, our soul feels its wings of possibility and wants to soar. This gives us greater ability to feel empathy, to be compassionate, to love. Beauty is one of the great gateways through which more soul enters our physical body.

Not only does Rhiannon hold the mirror to reflect Her beauty, Her reflected light also illuminates shadow. She shows the ways of the Heart and the reflection of what our outer situations and choices are really showing us about our inner life.

Our shadow involves the places we try so very hard to hide from our self, to avoid looking into, and which we have become so good at projecting onto others so that we do not have to feel or own them ourselves. The Mirror of the Goddess asks us to see our empowerment, our shining gift, our loving nature and greatness as well as all the places of smallness, of avoidance, of shadow, which are also part of our gift if we become conscious of them. She shows us how to become more visible. This then is the Soul Quest of women and men called to the Path of Rhiannon.

For women, this ‘becoming visible’ is a conscious choice requiring courage, and the support of healthy sisterhood circles. Deeply rooted fear places have a strong hold after centuries in which being visible has been very dangerous. However, it is an important part of the soul journey into healthy femininity, free from the patterns and undermining ways of patriarchy which we so often unconsciously perpetuate. To become visible as who we really are means to become more conscious, and this is empowering. In choosing to live our empowerment, we have a need to initiate into the embodied forms of the Mature Healthy Feminine archetypes.

Archetypes which reveal them self through the Teachings of Rhiannon and Her wheel of the year. As well as the Maiden, Lover, Mother and Crone aspects of Goddess, The Wheel of Rhiannon reveals the Path Finder, Deep Diver, Queen and Soul Song Singer on the elemental quarters of the Wheel.

In the East of the Wheel, we find Rhiannon of Fire. She manifests as Path Finder and is the courageous Explorer as well as Kundalini or Snake Dancer.  As the young healthy feminine archetype She holds the place of true originality and anarchy, the opposite of both conformity and rebellion. She  guides into healthy exploration of the self and creativity both in relation to others and as trailblazer daring to be different. She seeks outside of what is given and constructs her own responses to life. At this time, none of us experienced this exploration in fullness, as we all come from and through patriarchy. This has far reaching consequences for the initiation into healthy womanhood and the mature feminine archetype of the Queen on the opposite side of the Wheel. Rhiannon as Path Finder helps us to find our way back to the Real, to the Radiance of Goddess within us and lights our Kundalini fire.

In the South of the Wheel, Rhiannon of Water, Goddess of Flow is the Deep Diver into truth, sexuality and owning of emotions. She is the Mermaid self, Vessel for the Devine energies, watery mirror of the deep tides, completely free in Her joyous expression of self, celebration and sexuality. She holds the comb to untangle all that belongs to us, from the expectations and projections of others. She brings the gifts of insight and compassion and sings the irresistible soul song of the heart that calls our destiny towards us and into being. Rhiannon as Deep Diver brings our deep receptivity and the surrender to go with the flow of life in the wisdom of our body.

In the West, we find the other point of balance between the light and dark in the year, and here we meet Rigatona: Great Queen Rhiannon, She who manifests and owns Her Realm. Owning meaning both claiming that which she has created as well as  knowing her shadow self. Realm being all that for which she chooses to take responsibility. She invites shared responsibility and is the Freedom Rider of Her own Path which She determines with clarity, dignity and ease. She has gained from Her life’s experience and the full extent of the path finding Her Explorer Self has undertaken. With directed action She chooses Her path and knows how to stay present to receiving. She brings her gifts of self-responsibility, gratitude, joyful maturity, empowerment, and abundance. Queen Rhiannon leads to the realization that now is the only time you have got and so to stand in your power of each moment.

In the North segment of the Wheel, Rhiannon of Air manifests as the Ancestral Enchantress of Destiny, She of the Magical Birds, deep dreams, sweet scent and clear vision. She is the soul song Singer, as well as the great Nothing, the Void into which we drop when we surrender in ecstasy, trust, faith and death. She is the space that holds the Soul Song longing to be sung into being from within the Void itself. As Singer of this Soul Song, Rhiannon of Air holds the karmic pathways of the Path of Love and guides us to our destiny and brings attunement with the wisdom of our body.

The Priestess of Rhiannon training for the Glastonbury Goddess Temple works with the wisdom of these Archetypes and the mirror they offer us. Rhiannon’s mirror guides us to re-integrating the Sacred Sexual Priestess Self over the course of the year’s journey. Facing our fears and shame is an un-avoidable choice we make in taking this training and an essential part of being called to this path. But this is also the great gift of initiation as Her priestess.
In becoming Sacred Sexual Priestess in particular, we work with Her Wheel to find the exquisite treasures as well as the shameful shadow wounds and see what was hidden within in order to be free from habits that would keep us small, ashamed, fearful or guilty, less than we are, and in competition with each other. The Goddess of Love teaches a different way of being, a way of wholeness, authenticity and love. 
It is a pleasure to serve Her ways.

With Blessings
Katinka Soetens

Priestess of Rhiannon training is held every year between October and September in Glastonbury by Katinka Soetens. More information can be found on the Goddess Temple website and on

This is an extract from the soon to be available e-book Teachings of Rhiannon, Sacred Sexual Priestess Empowerment: part 1. £4.99 on

Wild versus Domestication; reclaiming the essence of our Free Innocence

In working with the reclaiming of our Innocence as an important part of the journey into Freedom, I felt like speaking into the theme of the wild versus domestication a little. 

These two concepts are not really opposites, as they are two such different energies in their true essence. 
Wild can never be domesticated, not without it becoming something that is no longer wild. 
Domestication, in the meaning of moral rules from the heart and in service of the community and life is a good thing if we think of Wild as the instinctual selfish survival urges and impulses only. In this meaning, domestication creates healthy loving boundaries for the sub or un conscious. 
Unconscious wildness is unpleasant and dangerous to be around and expresses in the ways of repressed/un-owned, distorted or rebellious 'wild'/out of control, aggressive, in-authentic behaviour; 'the feral in a domesticated world'. Domestication has become the means to impose ways of being in a power-over structure of domination.

The Wild in true meaning is an important part of our essence, it is from where all our creativity comes, it is magic, shape shifting, free, and it is not controllable. The Wild within is our Innocence: our complete presence in the moment, no past, no future, in total connection to what is.
It is responsible and conscious, and does not need to have boundaries put on it, as it is boundaried /calm and limitless at the same time. It is not controllable from the outside in any power-over form. The Wild is always Free.

For all power-over systems, Wilderness is therefore dangerous.The very reason why we, in our society, are at war with Nature. And it is true that there are risks involved in entering or engaging with the Wild. Wilderness is not 'safe', within the understanding of our illusion of what safety is in patriarchy. Wilderness is not necessarily pretty, but we are a part of it and it is a part of us, and it is alive within us, calling us to awaken to our Freedom. 

True wilderness is our essence, our nature.
For this essence in us, Wilderness, both in our human nature (especially the sexual, which is our life energy) as well as the Natural world out there, is not dangerous or scary, it is HOME. 

This is the belonging, the owning of source we seek to find through the layers of 'domestication' imposed by judgemental power over structures. Wilderness in this essence, is free and none destructive; in tune with the Flow of Life, fully in the heart. It does not need to rebel or dominate, but instead leads us to true power, clarity, co-operation and self responsibility.

The normal re-action to Domestication in our society and in the immature feminine and masculine is either conformity or rebellion, and usually a combination of the two. This just feeds domestication and gives it a reason d'etre. Real response to Domestication is Freedom in the true meaning of the word: self responsible Wildness, unhindered by the patterns of our own wounding and immaturity. 

Don't attack domestication, it has it's place and function, see it for what it is, and which, like something that is no longer of use, can be left behind. No need for getting trapped in Victim mode once the places of your domestication, the cutting down (or off) of Wilderness in you, has been identified. 
Let it go, move, become, be fact, feel the wild which does not really need to do anything to be.

Wilderness needs to be nurtured and being out in Natural places, spending time in the Wild will enhance your relationship with Wilderness as the close lover asleep in your own heart. Authenticity, honesty, owning your needs and desires, enhances Wilderness.

Much joy in the exploring and sharing. 
With Blessings

Ejaculation control and the movement of the Universe

In my work as sexual healer I am gifted with many moments of beauty, deep connection to source and insights that seem worth sharing from time to time.

In this blog, I’d like to speak from the place of intuition, from our ancient body wisdom, from the place of remembering the energetic flows of our body and honouring our aliveness as sexual.

Life energy is sexual energy, being alive is an intensely erotic experience. Through our senses we connect and interact within the body and in all our interaction, reaction, exchange and response to all that is outside of our physical body. All our senses are the interface between our ‘land’ and the rest of the universe, and the place where the Devine manifest into recognizable being within us.

As a woman, I am privileged to work with men willing to journey into exploring greater authenticity, healing and ownership of their life force, their core masculinity and their sexual energy.

One of the elements in this, as well as the work of many sexual awareness and consciousness paths, is the dis-entanglement of the association of orgasm and ejaculation in men. The two are not the same. This is common knowledge in many places in the world, but in the West we are only just re-awakening to this fact.

For me, in essence, this un-coupling is a practice in presence, a letting go of the drive to chase arousal, and instead surrender to the expression of the flow of erotic, alive, sensual, sexual energy in the body.

As we in our society haven’t got the advantage of an upbringing or a culture in which this is a natural part of sexual exploration and initiation, the unlearning of the habit to ejaculate at the same time (or around the time) of orgasm can take considerable effort and dedication.

The gains are well worth it of course, and a relaxing into the ecstatic state which expands us as humans beyond our normal experience of who we are as beings, one of the great gateways into meeting and experiencing the Devine, is re-opened.

The great wellbeing, often experienced as bliss resulting from this expanding, answers a deep longing, which, when unmet, manifests as a dissatisfaction, a hunger, a restless search for the filling of the place of lack with something from the outside, be it pleasure, possessions, new romance, drugs or other addictions.

The sacred space that flows in our body when we listen, when we follow and are in tune with our life energy, which is sexual, brings us into experiencing a deep home coming, a state of being which is the opposite of doing; no goal, no need, a fullness which nourishes the body and radiates out peacefully, with all the benefits this brings to us, our relationships and to life on the planet.

Because our sexual instincts are so wonderfully primal (part of our survival impulses), and because we are habitual beings, it is often at a certain point in the awakening of consciousness in men (often triggered by a crisis of the soul), that it is no longer possible to hide the patterns of wounding in the expression of their sexuality, and this journey, which can look differently for different people, starts in a new, more profound way.

There is now greater understanding, through the findings of modern science, around the addictive effects of the hormones released by ejaculation, in particular what the effects of dopamine in the brain chemistry are and which patterns are therefore set in motion.
These addiction patterns, in tandem with our habitual nature, create a hard habit to break. What this means is, that anything we do, e.g. at the time of orgasm, becomes associated. For example, if we chewed instead of ejaculated when orgasm is reached, we’d have to chew each time we came.

At the same time, it is also becoming more clearly into consciousness how, in the relationship patterns between men and women, ejaculation is drawn unconsciously by women: a power game of the sub-conscious layers of our relating. The unmet places and unspoken patterns in a relationship often find their only outlet in sex, which is why many relationship problems manifest as sexual dis-satisfaction or dis-function.

And so the scene is set.

Women have unlearned how to hold the tender beautiful soft glide into landing after a man orgasms (and/or ejaculates): we can no longer feel his wave and guide him into surrendering to the flow in his body and full incorporation of the energetic field. Men follow their addiction and miss the gentle expansion into riding the orgasmic wave of woman to their own multi orgasmic bliss. Men and women have become goal and performance driven sex engines, seeking always ‘more’ in response to the deep hunger for fulfillment which is fed by endless media stories of how to ‘do it’ better or more adventurously.

Always driving the chase of the arousal, of the excitement in the body, and the tightening of energy around that in the body, which sure enough will result in an increase in the intensity of experience in the moment. It also re-creates the need for greater intensity the next time as the numbing of tissues and subtle energy bodies continues. So, caught in a perpetual loop, what do we do to be free?

The skills and practices necessary to re-learn how to surrender to your essence and to be free from the addiction of chasing your arousal and instead be fully present, is an essential and, at the same time, simple process. For men wanting to live more consciously and in a greater state of presence, ejaculation control is an important part of that journey.

There are many ways to explore this field, Tantra and Toa-ist practices and meditations being the most obvious.

However, what I am seeing is the risk of these essential skills becoming the next state of doing, again, removing the man from the place of experiencing his state of being. The very word: ‘Ejaculation Control’ holds the key to this contradiction in terms.  Conscious ejaculation would be my preferred terminology, though still it implies more of a state of ‘doing’ rather then a ‘being present with’.

There are certainly places where ‘never ejaculate’, or only do so when wanting to pro-create, is not advocated. Instead the learning is to be conscious around your ejaculation, to choose it and fully enjoy the flight, including the landing (which can take many hours).

What I am finding is that men who have re-trained themselves to dis-associate ejaculation from orgasm might have a period of time of experiencing their ejaculation as less powerful then before. There is good medical evidence confirming this experience around a weakening of the muscle tissues in and around the prostrate/urethral sponge if ejaculation is withheld over a prolonged period of time.

There is also anecdotal evidence of pain or tension in the testicles experienced by men practicing non-ejaculation orgasm, particularly when doing so by themselves. Perhaps the old myth of ‘Blue Balls’ holds some truth?

In my experience there is a correlation between the inner clitoric tissues in the deeper layers of a woman’s body, especially where these meet and surround the urethral sponge and this tension or pain in the testis.

In a woman, a build up of un-released energy in these tissues, (energy which is orgasmic, and which often, though not always, releases as ejaculation in women) leads to urinal tract irritation or even infection. It is of little surprise to me then that, if the erotic energy is not circulated in the body and released from the ‘storage tissues’, irritation, pain or other problems may arise.

A man’s balls are highly sensitive energetic receptors and express feelings; they are cyclical in nature and in fact very subtly in tune with the ovaries of the women in the life of the individual man. Testicals are trying to tell us something about the inner emotional landscape and experiences the individual is having. They have a strong voice of wisdom in the body and, like the yoni in women, carry the emotional memory of wounding. Most men are cut off from the energy and power of their balls in one way or another. No wonder pain is often experienced in them for no apparent medical reason.

Actually, when I connect to a man’s balls, from the fullness of my womb space, radiating the ovarian energy field, which is of a star-like quality and full of life force, what I meet is a swirling energy, a deep pulse which feels like the energy of that which moves the stars.

The energy with spins the universe lives in the balls of men.

This energy is both stillness and motion, it is not to be dammed in or contained, it is meant to spin, circulate, expand and contract. It resonates with the great pulse of the universal: in and out breath which spins the cosmos.
I am in awe of this beauty, this power, and feel the delicious dancing of my star-light energy field in recognition.

In deep honouring of what I perceive as truth in my body, I’d like to offer this finding as an invitation into deeper exploration of who we are in the body, and to be careful with the delicate energy field of the balls, which includes ejaculation or ‘injeculation’ (where the energetically absorption as supposed to expulsion occurs). I’d like to hold space for the exploration of the releasing of patterns and the full honouring of the gift that is the sexual dance between men and women, help the relearning of our magic body wisdom, to facilitate and honour relaxing into the orgasmic wave whether including ejaculation or not.

As with the reclaiming and re-discovery work of the beautiful energetic dance in a female body, there is much to be discovered for men, and a greater tenderness both with them selves (inner) and in relationships (outer) with their balls, including listening to the deep wisdom of ejaculation, is required in the healthy evolution of the expression of our sexual energy

On the importance of initiation ceremony

Initiation means to start, to become part of, to be admitted as a member of a group, to be given secret knowledge, and to have power or right to take action as part of that group.
Initiation ceremony is the marker of this start or the becoming part of the group, the place where the secret knowledge is passed on and the one being initiated becomes marked as, is witnessed as, and celebrated for the change that has started, the group they have become a part of, and the responsibilities that come with that belonging.

The importance of Initiation ceremonies as markers of rite of passage in life and as recognition of the skills, responsibility and age of the individual within the community has always been important and understood. It is part of our healthy psychological development, of the archetypical journey into maturity we as souls individually and collectively all must under take.

Within the field of biological child development, the clearly defined stages of maturity are understood and the shifts where the natural focus of the child is directed, seen. In many human societies around the world initiation is still very much part of the fabric of community and family life. Unfortunately in our Western societies we have mostly lost these important healthy markers of the change of energy of the body and the development of the soul.

Initiations are the expression of the collective recognition of these stages of development. In tribal communities a baby is welcomed with a naming ceremony; an opportunity for the blessing and welcoming of the new being, and the recognition and commitment to support the new parents in their role by the wider family and community circle.
At around 7 years of age, the stage of leaving small childhood, when the focus of the child shifts from the mother to the father, this rite of passage is marked with a 'Boyhood or Maidenhood ' ceremony in which the child is celebrated. the young person is told about the sacredness of their body and being and the ceremony offers space for the commitment of the family and community to help and guide the child in the exploration of who they are safely. The child ceremonially leaves behind the baby child hood and takes on a responsibility which contributes to the wellbeing and running of the family/community (a job of their choice for which they are now responsible).
At around 14, when the child becomes a young person whose focus shifts from the mother/father to the mentor, a youth initiation would be held which marks the young person's right to now sit in the women's or men's house, to listen and learn and start to contribute to adult life. the youth would have chosen or been given a mentor, the one who would have been part of the wider tribal community and who would have guided this next stage of the young persons development and helped him or her step into the responsibility of being a young adult. In today's distorted society, there are no mentors, and so peer groups or gangs of equally immature youngsters have taken the place of the wise elder the young person would have chosen.

In our modern life, there is no initiation ceremony to mark the changes in the body and being of the young person, no community to hold the process, to give the secret teachings or provide the mentors, there is instead confusion as to what their role should be. Not only do they receive a whole lot of mixed messages, from not being allowed the privileges of belonging to the adult world but having to behave in a responsible manner, to being almost forced into a prolonged childhood of lack of responsibility and lack of nurturing and trust in their ability to take on further responsibility and freedom. School systems are a strong example of how the discord of messages at this age is delivered. No wonder there is rebellion or 'zoning out', or the reckless experimentation with forbidden behaviour or substances, the seeking for identity and belonging amongst peer groups, etc that many young people experience.

For girls there is at leased the physical mark of entering young adulthood in the form of Menarche (first menstruation), which can come at any time between the ages of 8 to 17 within the normal biological range. Unfortunately, there is no preparation of any real kind to the deeper meanings of the start of this journey into womenhood, nor a healthy open attitude around how to hold and celebrate the Menarche itself. The loss of mentors as the wise women circles of old contribute strongly to the lack of maturity in women we see in our society today; the lack of confidence and trust in the beautiful wisdom of the female body and energetic flow, which leads to the stunted flight of the individual throughout their lives.

For boys entering this stage of young adulthood the situation is even more bleak. There is no longer any honouring or marking of their changing energy and physical body, no responsibility to become theirs as they proof themselves worthy of the requirements of the community: a healthy way to channel their energy and gifts. The school exam has taken the place of the vision quest, the 'mark of the man' replaced by the latest fashion statement of discontent. The feelings of lack of respect, understanding and total absence of the places of actually being appreciated for who they are which most young people experience, are a sad reminder of how we as societies miss this precious resource and opportunity to enhance the whole of the community. Instead we have the self perpetuating conditions which lead to immature masculinity/femininity seeking and finding outlet in the undesirable behavioural expressions of the distortions of patriarchy.

It is time to re-address these issues, to reclaim and newly create meaningful markers of rites of passage, to remember the old ways of initiation ceremony which are an integral part of our psyche and our make up as human beings, and make them applicable to the here and now of our times.

It is time to re-learn how to hold initiation ceremony for our own inner immature masculine and feminine and for our young people desperately asking for this guidance in our communities. Lets initiate a new way, lets start initiating our young people as valued, recognised members of our society.